one sunshiney day in Trinity Bellwoods Park in downtown Toronto, an irish couple that had been together for three years were deeply in love and prone to romantic gestures worthy of a ralph fiennes movie. kelsie, whose heart was inextricably linked to callum, come ruin or rapture, decided to send her ginger-haired lover on a scavenger hunt throughout the park.
as he followed balloons, notes, photos, and scientific formulas that described the tapestry of their love, he knew that soon he would be in possession of a bottle of bubbly, a pain au chocolat, and the key-owner to his heart.
just another one of those wonderful things you can stumble upon in your city …. if you’re paying attention.
During Love A Heart, me and SOFI (not safi, dammit) and her friend steph were photographed by the event-photography magazine SNAP. I totally forgot about it until I was sent this above pic from the print copy. I must get my hands on that print copy. If you have it, please save it for me!
so i went on the SNAP website and found our photo. I found it odd and annoying that SNAP wanted to charge me $5 for downloading my own face! Luckily, there’s a handy little tool that comes with my PC called “Snipping Tool.” Hey SNAP, you should look into that.
Being single on Valentines Day rules because you don’t hafta shave your pits or your legs, thusly increasing your happiness exponentially!!
Found this Hirsute-Happy-Hombre in Graffiti Alley.
For me, Valentines Day is like the opening sequence of Saving Private Ryan, except every third person is a woman puking into her handbag, looking for her morning-after-Bacardi-breezer.
That being said, I hope your Valentines Day is full of …..
Ewan McGregor’s peen ….
… and not full of Richard Wright’s infidelity….
…with copious amounts of dancing The Lindler.
Mmmmmmm, Christopher Plummmerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrowr.
You laughed as I covered you over with leaves; face, breast, hips, and thighs. You smiled when I said the leaves were just the color of your eyes.
one day i will sing this song with somebody that i love.
Local rabble rouser and loveable shit disturber Zach Bussey (the infamous charlatan behind Ontario’s Sexiest Election Candidate campaign) has given a run-down of all the ladies on the auction block, how much you can expect to pay, and what you’ll get for your money.
Here’s what he had to say about yours-truly:
Everybody knows Christine. Show us your tweets Christine! (If you follow her, you’ll get that.) Christine is great company who always makes me laugh, and I’m like Stalin (or maybe Teller.. whichever one laughs less?) She also can spot graffiti from a mile away and keeps getting recognition for it *cough Toronto Star*.
I expect a conglomerate of buyers to pitch in and grab Christine for no less than $170.
That’s awfully kind and generous of him to say. Bussey was actually the very first person I ever met from Twitter IRL (he lent me a flip cam!) so he’s always gonna be one of mah boyeeez. He’s always polarizing and mouthy (remind you of anyone you know?), and had some choice words for some of the other ladies on the auction block, so read what he has to say, as a past-participant and current supporter.
Hope to see you all there! Let’s be Valentines!
Fellas, now is your chance to date me! ………………..
I’m being auctioned off for charity!…………………
Jeez, tough crowd.
Well anyway, click on the above image to get details on the Love A Heart event, where the hottest bachelors and bachelorettes in Toronto (and, uh, me) will be auctioned off to raise funds for the Heart & Stroke Foundation.
It takes place on February 9th and The Hideout (484 Queen Street West), doors at 8pm, cover is $5.
If you’re not interested in being dis gal’s Valentine, there are lots of other beauties on the auction block (I know almost all the gals, they’re pretty saucey). As for you ladies out there looking to buy a man-whore, I know almost all the guys being auctioned as well, and they are SEXY MO-FO’S! There’s even two professional athletes on the auction block, one from Toronto Rock (that’s our pro lacrosse team) and another from the Toronto Argonauts (pro football team, CFL)!
To top it off, there’ll be a live performance by Indie Music Week champions Tiny Danza.
It’s going to be a really fun night, even if you don’t want to bid, you can at least come say hi and introduce yourself! We’ll clink glasses and talk about graff!
And you’ll get to watch me sell-out for a fiver.
the horseshoe moustache is thankfully gone now (this photo of us was taken during Movember), so at least my chin can take a break this weekend.
Enjoy your weekend (and all the rug-burns that comes with it), munchkins!