Dans cette maison de pierre, Satan nous regardait danser, J’ai tant voulu la guerre de corps qui se faisaient la paix
my going-away party…dinner, dancing, and ice skating. how very canadian-in-london-esque.
i’ve spent all week packing. my room, once full of life, is now empty hooks, wires, walls, dust and debris scattering the floor. boxes and suitcases.
2 years running in and out of this room. the giggling. the crying. tracking dirt. changing outfits over and over again. make-up disasters. coiffure-malfunctions. fights with boyfriends. sharing my single bed. listening to the voices outside my window. fireworks. sex in the next room, shaking my walls.
bbc and channel 4 shows. alex zane on xfm radio. running to catch the next tube. the bendy buses and the double decker buses. lugging in tesco groceries. text messaging well into the night.
tugging up nylons. plucking my eyebrows. punching my pillow.
talking for hours on the phone with my mates.
planning the next travelling extravaganza across europe.
collapsing, exhausted after work.
lugging my tired ass outta bed for work.
incense wafting about. blogging about the play i just saw. writing plays and stories. kissing boys. msn antics. staring at the dogs in the park. sunlight from the windows. english cups of tea. snuggling under covers. cold toes. hot hands. running to the bathroom frequently during bladder infections. sucking down popsicles after a bout in the hospital. watching myself on the television and cringing.
hugging my friends goodbye. hugging my loves goodbye. goodbye. hugging away the city.
london. what an incredible city. i’ll be back at some point. i don’t know when. i don’t know what’s going to happen in the next little while. my heart is breaking. even though it’s stronger than it ever has been before.
the place that reinvigorated my soul…maybe i’m still going to find that place. the universe sends me a knowing wink.
quiet. don’t blink.