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Vancouver Day 2

as far as i’m concerned Rachel Weisz is Jesus Christ. so read my film review of her latest flick Agora, where she hands men cloths soaked with her period. I WOULD SO DO THAT IF THE SITUATION WARRANTED IT.

oi! muppet! fuckin’ hell, ya avn’ a laff, innit geeza!? ya council flat Chav! are ya takin the piss? ya haven’t seen UK indie hit Fish Tank about a 16 year old east londoner with gold hoop earrings? what are ya like??!! read my film review here

i dunno what’s more unthinkable….that this film Unthinkable is so bad it makes you want to cut your fingers off, or that in this film a guy gets his fingers cut off. either way, read my film review where i tear the film a new rectum-rash.

*   *   *   
alright back to my west-coast penetration
the view of the city (and BC Place where the Olympics were back in february) from the Vancouver Lookout Tower. it’s a poor-man’s CN Tower, but ya can’t officially complain. 
i actually wanted to go to the Vancouver Art Gallery instead, but they were gonna charge me $22! the reasoning is that their Degas paintings came straight from Musée D’Orsay in Paris. Well i’ve been to the Musée D’Orsay and they don’t fucking charge that much!!! The VAG is mean….and she’s expensive to get into.(ha)
David Foster isn’t “notable.”
gastown is named after a guy named Gassy Jack. i think i dated him.
lion’s gate bridge! if you’re a cineophile, you’ll know why that’s important.
hiked over to Horseshoe Bay (about 45 mins outside the metropolis) to Sewell’s Marina for a Sea Safari! i got my ticket for free with all my Air Miles points, but if i had paid for it, it woulda been $73! FANKS AIRMILES GUY
they suited me up like i was in haz.mat.
fuck off guy.
our guide was brutally hot & had a schexy quebecois accent.
gawwwwd fuck off
and off we go
seals be the most suave coolie muthafuckas up in hurr. they’re just chillin like villains. just stylin’ n’ profilin. just peepin wit their bredrin.
whut up humanoid lifeforms
splashy splashy playful snuggles!
bye fatties!

i took a gazillion videos of the sea safari we were zooming along the water on that zodiac at illegal speeds, i sat wayyy in the front like a shitdisturber, felt like a rollercoaster hitting the waves and catapulting myself into the air. total rocket launcher. banged up my arm on one bump. will post videos when i get back to toronto, my days are too BUSSEH!
back in vancity, checking out gastown’s famous steam clock. it’s pretty and all, but also a bit yawnful
and it farts steam when the hour strikes.
*   *   *  
yesterday i met up with my mates katie (aka my wifey) and anny (omg i love anny! girl crush!) so photos of my day 3 to come  soon. today i’m going kayaking off of english bay and tomorrow i’m off to whistler, will try to keep ya’ll updated!


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