"Blogging isn't journalism, it's graffiti with punctuation."

Vice

My latest VICE essay: Germany’s flea markets have a dirty little secret

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You guys know I’m a huge flea market nut. I’ve blogged about the stuff I’ve found before. But the flea markets I used to patron in Germany when I lived there (specifically Cologne and Berlin) all carried lots of Nazi junk, which for a Canadian, is not something you ever get used to seeing. In this piece, I talk about the disturbing nature of these pieces, and also how they have affected me.

I feel like our morbid interests aren’t inherently good or bad. It’s what we do with those interests that’s important … I think learning from this stuff is a positive thing.

Click here or on the above photo to read it.

I took all of the photographs featured in the piece. The one of the framed monochrome photographs on a mantle is actually in my bedroom. Those couples just look so happy!

If you missed it, read my last VICE essay about my stint on reality TV, or my first VICE piece about my wicked-awesome eyebrows.

Fanks for reading, munchkins.


Confessions of a Reality TV Whore: A Cautionary Tale

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Check out my latest essay in VICE, about the clusterfuck that is reality TV, and how I shit-talked my way onto not one, but two of ’em. Click the above image or click here to read.

If you missed it, here’s my VICE essay from last week about my bushy fucking demon-eyebrows.

Like last week, my essay is one of the most popular on the Vice network.

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Fanks for reading, munchkins!


The Brow Game: my latest essay published in Vice

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I have had so many interactions with people lately based solely on the furry situation happening north of my eyes that I thought I’d write an entire think-piece on it. I sold it to Vice because, as you know, they love a good eyebrow think-piece. I mean, who doesn’t? Amirite? Click on the above image, or click here to read it.

I’ve been reading Vice since 1998 and am a long-time subscriber, so it’s nice to be included in their canon. Back then the only place in Toronto you could get Vice was in the entryway to Suspect Video at the first of the month, and you had to scramble because everyone was snatching them up. When I was living in London, I found a record shop on D’Arblay Street in Soho that stocked Vice waaay in the back, so you wouldn’t know they had it unless you were a regular.

I remember years ago reading this particular Don’t from their Do’s & Don’ts section and pissing myself with laughter. Satire at its finest!

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You laughed. Admit it.

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Looks like Buzzfeed got wind of it.

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And it was one of the Most Popular articles on Vice too. Not too shabby.

I’m getting lotsa great comments from women on this piece … and lotsa “fuck-your-eyebrows-and-fuck-you” comments from aggro white dudebros.

Hail Hydra.